September 27, 2009
It’s really a chance to pray, making a medicine wheel. I ask what the intention is for this wheel and find that it is to raise the vibration of the camping area so that this area becomes a camp for those who seek to be more conscious, and each summer there are many attracted with a higher purpose of conscious refinement. I call out to the Directions for the size and form this wheel is to hold. I call out to each stone, “Who is to be placed next?” I ask where each needs to go to support this intension. It is a process that is not about speed. After 5 hours I am only 1/3 done and am whooped. These stones are heavy. Eight of them are much too heavy for me. Tomorrow I’ll complete it. I take a swim at placenta rock in this 90 degree heat. What a good name for this boulder!
September 28, 2009
Five more hours and lots more prayer takes me through the many layers of intension for this wheel. Forgiveness of self for all humanity is the majority prayer as the outer circle and the inner circle is formed. I finish not today but in the third day’s morning sun. 12 hours of deep prayer for humanity’s awakening created this rock formation that will silently sit in the riverbed till the next snowmelt.
On the fourth day, the camp area erupts. Young people screaming to each other, not talking, not yelling in fun, but screaming their conversations. I don’t understand. They are throwing rocks, big rocks, down at the dam, smashing them down on others. I haven’t seen this kind of behavior before. Then a woman walked past me and said she had heard them screaming about “meth” and we both understood. Later talking to David, he told me that a psychologist said that meth is something that supports the ego to be unleashed. That’s just what was happening in the behavior that I saw. It was scary to see the ego take over.
The next morning, two days after the medicine wheel was finished, I realize that I feel finished here after the wheel was done. I look below on my morning walk to my meditation tree in the sun and see that the three stone dams that so nicely held the deep waters for the swimming hole have been destroyed. All the rocks are strewn all over. I hear, “When the vibration rises, chaos results in order for the change to occur.” I think back on several situations and think of the truth in this.
September 29, 2009
The stunning house I was to rent high up the mountain was reclaimed by its owner. I am sad that I will not be living at this place that birthed my book, Sacred Birthing, Birthing A New Humanity. I realize that I must be heading the wrong direction. Ok, where DO you want me? Why am I here??? Show me so that I get it!